Guy having sex in the car
See MoreHave you ever walked past a piece of furniture or some other inanimate object and thought, Hey, thats got a hole in it. I wonder if I can stick my dick in there...If you have, youre not alone. Either due to bizarre sexual fetishes or just plain boredom, men have gotten caught screwing anything and everything. Some of which dont even seem possible. Take for instance...Advertisement6A Picnic TableIt says something about relations between the UK and America when the Telegraph publishes the headline: American Caught Having Sex With Picnic Table . Seriously, does it matter where the guy was from? So what if one guys pursuit of happiness took the form of sticking his schlong inside the umbrella hole of a picnic table. Do not such things transcend borders?After all, isnt this the sort of thing that could happen to anybody? Maybe a girl had been there just moments ago, and rolled away at the last minute. Maybe it was dark. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementSeriously.Now, filming it the first time is understandable. You just want to have evidence for when the cops say, There is no way some guy is fucking a table. But somewhere after the second time, the overall impression you givr off goes from disgusted to intrigued to DAMMIT ITS ALMOST MIDNIGHT! WHERE ARE YOU, YOU TABLE DEFILING STALLION! LOOK AT IT, JUST BEGGING FOR YOUR MIGHTY LANCE OF FLESH!If my dick was a carpenter, this is the table it would design.But eventually the neighbor did turn the tapes over to the police, who arrested the perpetrator and presumably drew straws over which poor bastard was going to watch the hours of evidence. The man was charged with felony counts of public indecency because his frolic with the worlds most vulnerable fourlegged beast happened near an elementary school. Continue Reading BelowWere guessing this made for some long, awkward conversations between fourth graders and their parents.5Street SignsA Sioux Falls, South Dakota man was arrested when a neighbor came home and had the following thought train barrel down the center of his mind, Hmm, there appears to be a 60yearold man in my backyard in a trench coat and panty hose, holding a camcorder. Perhaps hes a pervert.After the man was arrested, police found hours of tape that were kind of like that haunted video from The Ring, only instead of killing you, it just permanently negates the possibility of an erection for the remainder of your adult life. Police say the tapes included two years worth of the man defiling street signs. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementTwo goddamn years. And thats just the ones he was taping, who knows how many street signs he fucked and got away with it. This proves once and for all the forensics and crime scene work you see on CSI is a big load of bullshit. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementThe mans escapades didnt end there , either. His collection included video of himself in an all leather SM outfit while grinding against a door frame, instantly making it twice as awkward as any other SM film ever made.By the way, this is the guy were talking about.There was also video of him masturbating in front of traffic while wearing a mask, waving a gun at people while naked and digging a hole to literally fuck the ground. That has to be the pinnacle of messed up boning, right? Screwing the earth itself? Well we can say that hes not the first guy to get caught doing it , so maybe its a thing. Who are we to judge?4A BicycleA man from southwest Scotland apparently decided, while looking at his bike, that he wanted to ride it all night long, and in ways that would make Lance Armstrong weep tears of pure terror. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementThis, presumably, was not a problem for anyone until the night that two cleaning ladies for a local hostel walked in on a sight far more horrifying than anything Eli Roth could come up with: The 51yearold Scottish man, with trou fully dropped, was riding a bike in a way that God never intended.It has 10 speeds, all of them are sexy as hell.Oh, and did we mention that he stopped, knowing he was caught in one of the most awkward situations ever, acknowledged the cleaners in the room, and then continued gettin it on? Whether that is dedication, determination or retardation, it was probably backed with the thoughts and hopes that today would be the day he would get lucky and finally have that MFFBike orgy he always longed for.It didnt take long for them to call the cops, who booked his ass on charges of sexual breach of the peace, which we assume is Europespeak for making everyone at the station say What the Fuck? and Holy shit eww! He ended up pulling a page out of the celebrity I fucked up big time book and chalked it up to alcohol instead of that funny feeling he got in his pants when he saw a tricycle when he was a child. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementIn fairness, this bike is totally asking for it.The mans little Tour de France got him three years probation and placement on the sex offenders list, presumably with the note fucked bike next to it.3 Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementSo, imagine you are walking innocently down the street on an usually nice day in February. Its a few days after Valentines Day and you still have warm, fuzzy feelings of love and tenderness skipping through your chest. Yes life is full of sunshine and rainbows. Nothing can ruin your day ... right up to the moment you run into an extremely naked man grinding a lamp post like the strip show from Hell itself.Congratulations, you now know exactly how those school children and young women felt when they encountered this exact scenario in Wiltshire, England. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementNoone will ever believe me.The nameless 32yearold man, whose identity is being protected for reasons we are unsure of (other than to not be called a lamposexual in public) was soon arrested for suspicion of outraging public decency. Suspicion? Really? Even with eye witnesses? Now we are curious to find out how much more detective work it would take to get a conviction on publicly boning a street lamp.We would also like to take this opportunity to point out how England is dominating this list. Kind of adds a whole new layer to that Telegraph headline from earlier. Extra! Extra! Its an American fucking an inanimate object this time!2A Park BenchLate one night, a certain man was walking around Hong Kong, in the park, lonely and bored. So he did what many of the lonely and bored people on this list did, and found the nearest thing with a hole in it to fuck. Then he saw it: a park bench, with holes in it. And then he made the fateful decision to have bit of the old in and out with it. Whats the harm? Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementThis is the harm:Yes, that video is totally accurate, his penis got stuck in the bench . His illadvised boning adventure soon led to over a dozen emergency personnel attempting to rescue him, while trying to hold in the Nelson Muntz style laughter brewing inside each of them.The doctors had to use needles to drain blood from the mans penis but, sadly for Xing, getting stabbed in the dick did nothing to stop the swelling and loosen things up, so the rescuers had to cut away the part of the bench that he was stuck to, and shipped him off by ambulance, where it took doctors a painfully long four hours to remove the sheet of metal from Les dong, which he almost lost.Ew, gross, not her. I want whats under her. Hell yeah.So, yeah, from beginning to end that whole thing was one big Worst Case Scenario. All because of a single, momentary, horny lapse of judgment. Youd think that would scare people of inanimate object sex forever, but theres at least one guy were pretty sure is still going strong. His name is Edward Smith and he has sex with... Continue Reading Below1CarsEdward Smiths love of cars didnt translate into a nice collection of rare vehicles, or a career as a mechanic. Oh, no, hes on this list because he wanted to express his love in a different way. Awww yeah.Edward is one of a tiny number of people who are called mechaniphiliacs (only about 500 of them, as far as we know), and its just what it sounds like. These are people that treat car washes like late night Cinemax movies, except instead of naughty inmates at an allgirls prison, its seeing that dirty slut of a Scion get buffed nice and slow, just how papa likes it.By Edwards count, since age 15 hes made love to around a thousand cars and he doesnt care who knows it (judging by the fact that he has done TV interviews about it).Our research hasnt made it clear exactly how someone has sex with a car. Obviously youd think of the tailpipe, but that would seem to create difficulties in terms of the positioning, especially for a car built low to the ground. And the car absolutely cannot be mounted while its moving, as youll see in this set of 30 photos of our attempt to demonstrate this. Continue Reading BelowAdvertisementphotos removed EdOn top of all that, youd always have that doubt in the back of youre mind that youre accidentally cornholing Optimus Prime.The last guy you would want to date rape.Edwards current fling is a Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, which instantly makes every Herbie the Love Bug movie ever made five times creepier. Other cars hes gave his mighty meat shaft to include: a 1993 Ford Ranger Splash he called Ginger, Cinnamon the 73 Opal GT, and a 69 Beetle which we are sure was probably the sluttiest car hes ever dated.But cars arent the only machine hes gone all the way with he claimed in the documentary he totally had a fling with this helicopter one time. Its here that were tempted to call bullshit on the whole thing, but really, why would somebody lie about that?Dont worry, even whats considered acceptable in the world of sex is getting weirder. Want proof? Check out, The 25 Most Disturbing Sex Toys and The 10 Most Terrifying Guides to Sex .And sex sex sex (Cracked.coms Top Picks) sex sex sex.
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Candy Red can play bashful innocence in public on a date with a hot stranger, but once they are alone in her apartment its a whole other story. This naughty re00:00 26:08Redhead fucked on a first dateViews: 95380:0026:08Candy Red can play bashful innocence in public on a date with a hot stranger, but once they are alone in her apartment its a whole other story. This naughty redhead knows what she wants and she is not shy to demand it she wants this guy to suck on her perky tits, fuck her good and cum right in her tight young pussy. Fuck yeah, she doesnt even want to know his name. All she needs is his cock and a powerful orgasm. Just casual sex, nothing more.Watching this hot teen chick walk down the street all this guy could think about were her sexy hips and tight little ass. He wanted to just grab those sexy butt00:00 15:21Dreams come true and he fucks this cutieViews: 280168380:0015:21Watching this hot teen chick walk down the street all this guy could think about were her sexy hips and tight little ass. He wanted to just grab those sexy buttocks and slam his cock in her wet pussy fucking the bitch from behind and making his balls slap against her sexy bottom. These raunchy dreams made him so horny that he just caught up with the cutie and told her he wanted to have sex with her right now. Wanna know what happened next? Watch this!Dima met this lovely young girl right on the street and the first thing that impressed him about her were those amazing sensual lips. He took her to his friend00:00 20:13Casual encounter and wild sexViews: 216122480:0020:13Dima met this lovely young girl right on the street and the first thing that impressed him about her were those amazing sensual lips. He took her to his friends home party and spent the whole evening dancing, chatting, having fun and fantasizing about her lips wrapping around his hard cock. By the middle of the night everybody left and Dimas fantasy became a reality when he began caressing this young beauty and she fully gave herself to him taking his cock in her mouth and pussy with great pleasure. Thats how horny teens casual encounter led to a wild and passionate sex.18:36No classes on winter holidays and these teens go from being extremely bored to being extremely horny in no time. No wonder when they accidently run into one ano00:00 18:36Casual sex on a winter nightViews: 137916840:0018:36No classes on winter holidays and these teens go from being extremely bored to being extremely horny in no time. No wonder when they accidently run into one another on the street the sexual tension makes them do something stupid and awesome at the same time. Watch them as they get busy having oral sex and fucking on a sofa and feel the pleasure they share! Yeah, this hottie sucks big dick like a pro and the guy fucks her sweet young pussy even better. A mustsee!26:08This teeny was definitely bored sitting all alone on a bench in front of a large apartment building, so even though she played hard to get at first I knew shed00:00 26:08Fucking instead of watching a movieViews: 124064330:0026:08This teeny was definitely bored sitting all alone on a bench in front of a large apartment building, so even though she played hard to get at first I knew shed eventually accept my invitation to go to my place and see a movie on my computer. Of course I just needed an excuse to get intimate with this pretty brunette and we ended up having some naked fun on a couch instead of watching a movie. From the way she moaned of pleasure taking my hard cock in her tight young pussy I knew she didnt mind against such a change of plans.22:00This cute teeny looked so lonely and so romantic standing all alone on a river embankment in the middle of a large city. How could a horny student just walk by00:00 22:00A company for casual sexViews: 47145030:0022:00This cute teeny looked so lonely and so romantic standing all alone on a river embankment in the middle of a large city. How could a horny student just walk by and not try to hook up with this eager beauty? She didnt mind company and as it turned out half an hour later she didnt mind having some casual fun with a hot stranger as well. Getting her pussy licked good, sucking cock and getting fucked to orgasm, aint that a great way to get to know one another a little better for a couple of sexcrazed 18 yearolds.22:32Teen chicks just love hot guys who play the guitar and this lucky dude sure knows how to impress a cutie he saw on a local playground having some fun on a swing00:00 22:32Being a gentleman for sexViews: 41742030:0022:32Teen chicks just love hot guys who play the guitar and this lucky dude sure knows how to impress a cutie he saw on a local playground having some fun on a swing. He started as a perfect gentleman inviting her home for a cup of tea, playing her a couple of songs and kissing her hand. Next thing he knew they were both naked and this sexy blonde was swallowing his cock balls deep like a real pro. What a surprise! She was up for anything and casual sex with an attractive stranger was definitely something she wanted on her menu that day.24:20Brian knows where its going when he picks up this cute nerdy hitchhiker to give her a lift around the city. He takes her to his place and this slender brunette00:00 24:20
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Ask a Guy: When a Guy Withdraws After Sexby Eric CharlesTweetIve been dating a guy who I have known for a while for a month. The dates have all been amazing, we have so many core values, beliefs, and lifestyle aspects in common.However, the part where he have sex and he withdraws happened. Ive been totally cool about it, giving him all the space in the world, no calls, texts, emails. My Facebook page (which I know he looks at) makes it clear Ive been out with friends, at events, and that good work things are happening.My questions are: Is ANY contact okay during this withdrawal, or is all contact off limits for a while (the Rules say it is)? How long do I give the withdraw period before realizing he doesnt want to take things further? Is there anything a girl can do, apart from knowing that the guy would be crazy to not want her and continue to have an awesome life? And is there any other form of encouragement we can provide that lets him know we are interested in him, but not sitting around helplessly?First, its a huge mistake to look at relationships like some sort of game where there are rules to follow and a strategic ways to respond to specific situations.It sounds like you want your relationship with the guy to progress and you read somewhere that guys lose interest after sex, and now youre freaking out because of receiving either bad advice, or misconstruing the advice you got.Let me make this simple for youGuys want to capture a prize . And yeah, of course guys want sex, so if you think that sex is the only bargaining chip you have then you will always feel paranoid about men using you.Think about it do you honestly think that men choose a woman for their one exclusive relationship just for sex ? Of all the sex with all the women out there they could be having do you really think its just about sex for a man to make his choice?I would have to imagine youd answer: Definitely not.OK then, if thats the case then the sex is a nonissue. Frankly, if you have a pulse, youre going to have sex with the guy sooner or later. So really, since its inevitable, the real concern is finding the something more that goes beyond just the sex.QUIZ: Is He Losing Interest In You?Listen, when you inspire a man to see you as a confident , fulfilled woman with plenty to offer other than physical pleasure, he doesnt treat you like an option. He pursues you with hunger and drive.When you have the mentality that you have one bargaining chip (sex) and that you should hold out because it will magically generate interest, youre viewing sex as your one and only asset.If a guy isnt all that into you, but knows youll give it up on date 3, hell stick around long enough to get some booty then leave. His thought process is most likely, Well, I wasted this much time with her might as well cash in on the obligatory third date sex.My point here is that if you want to win with this guy (or men in general), you have to view yourself as a prize to be won as a whole. Not just your sex. You need to see yourself as the proverbial Goddess on Earth, a spectacle to behold a woman that has that certain extra something that makes you rare and unlike the rest.People are entranced and captivated by someone who has an air of excitement, adventure and pleasure to them. While it can seem like men only want physical pleasure, what most really crave is a woman who reaches them on a deep and profound level.Going back to the whole issue of giving a guy space. First, keep in mind that if your mindset is needy towards the guy or relationship, the amount of time thats passed wont really matter.But I mean if he went from constant texting to now a full week going by with nothing, then go ahead and text him.
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